Lightning Fill In The Blank

Jan 20, 2018
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PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now it's time for our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS: Well, Mo has 3. Paula and Alonzo have 2.

SAGAL: All right. We have flipped a coin. And Alonzo has elected to go first. Alonzo, fill in the blank. On Thursday, President Trump denied claims made by chief of staff John Kelly that his opinion on blank had changed.

ALONZO BODDEN: The wall.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, it was revealed that special counsel Robert Mueller had issued a subpoena to former White House strategist blank.

BODDEN: Steve Bannon.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Tuesday, a falling blank caused a 2.0 earthquake in southwest Michigan.

BODDEN: Rock?

SAGAL: No, a meteor. On Tuesday, attorneys general from 22 states filed suit against the FCC in response to the agency's repeal of blank.

BODDEN: Net neutrality.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Monday, the CDC warned that this year's blank season would be particularly severe.

BODDEN: Flu.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: During his sentencing hearing, over 90 victims spoke out against Larry Nassar, a former doctor for the U.S. blank team.

BODDEN: Gymnastics.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, police blocked off a street in England after a teen...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...There blanked.

BODDEN: A teen in England - I'll just guess that he tried to bomb a really pretty dinosaur.

SAGAL: No. He refused to go to his dentist appointment and barricaded himself inside his house. According to the officers at the scene, the tense standoff lasted for several hours until the SWAT team resolved everything by bashing the door down, shining a light in the teen's face and telling him he needed to floss more.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Alonzo do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Well, he got five right - 10 more points. He has a total of 12 and the lead.

SAGAL: Well done. OK.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: All right. This means, Paula, you're up next. Fill in the blank. On a Thursday night, the House passed a bill aimed at avoiding a blank.

PAULA POUNDSTONE: Government shutdown.

SAGAL: Right. This week, Rex Tillerson said the 2,000 U.S. troops would remain in blank.

POUNDSTONE: Syria.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, blank announced the shortlist of possible cities for its second headquarters.

POUNDSTONE: Amazon.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: For the first time in its history, the blank closed above 26,000 points.

POUNDSTONE: The Dow Jones Industrial.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: During a Senate hearing this week, departing Utah Senator Orrin Hatch appeared to blank.

POUNDSTONE: Weep.

SAGAL: No. He appeared to remove a pair of glasses he was not wearing.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: I urge all concerned Americans to watch this video. This week, New Jersey voted to make it illegal to operate a blank while drunk.

POUNDSTONE: I don't know - a snowmobile?

SAGAL: No, a drone - according to the new study, 2017 was the second blank-est year on record.

POUNDSTONE: Hottest.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A Washington lawyer who was recently fined $50,000 after an ethics investigation...

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

SAGAL: ...Was later caught allegedly blanking.

POUNDSTONE: Cheating.

SAGAL: No. He was caught robbing a bank where he demanded exactly $50,000.

(LAUGHTER)

POUNDSTONE: Wow.

MO ROCCA: Wow. That's amazing.

SAGAL: Police say the lawyer was wearing a fake beard, a baseball cap and sunglasses when he arrived at the bank, demanded $50,000 and the keys to the teller's car. An alarm was tripped. The officers arrived before the man was able to make his getaway. At his hearing, he told the court he planned to represent himself. He just needed to swing by a bank real quick so he could get money to pay his own retainer.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, How did Paula do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Paula got five right - 10 more points. And guess what? She's tied at 12.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: All right. So how many, then, does Mo need to win?

KURTIS: Five to win.

SAGAL: OK, Mo. This is for the game. Fill in the blank. This week, North and South Korea announced they would march under one flag at the blank in February.

ROCCA: The Olympics.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: CNN, The New York Times and The Washington Post were the big winners at Trump's blank on Wednesday.

ROCCA: The Fake News Awards.

SAGAL: Yes. Damn them.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Thursday, Acting Director Nick Mulvaney requested a budget of blank for the consumer protection bureau that he heads.

ROCCA: A budget of money - a budget of - a budget of zero - no, a budget...

SAGAL: Yeah - a budget of zero. That's exactly right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: He required no money for it. A teenager in Texas attempting to rob another teen at gunpoint was foiled when his victim blank.

ROCCA: Oh, fainted - died.

SAGAL: No - tried to rob him at gunpoint, as well.

(LAUGHTER)

ROCCA: Oh, god.

SAGAL: With the last-second touchdown against the Saints, the blanks advanced to the NFC finals on Sunday.

ROCCA: Oh, Minnesota.

SAGAL: Yes, the Vikings.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Kim Kardashian and her husband blank welcomed their third child on Wednesday.

ROCCA: Kim Kardashian and her husband Kanye West.

SAGAL: Yes, indeed.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This week, a school superintendent in Missouri did not declare a snow day even after blank.

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

ROCCA: Even after the school collapsed under the weight of the snow.

SAGAL: No. He did not declare a snow day even after a student tried to bribe him with a bag of candy.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: He stepped outside to see if the weather warranted canceling school. Superintendent Doc Cornman of the Hillsboro School District found a pile of king-sized Reese's on his front step - and those are good - with a note reading, you know what to do.

(LAUGHTER)

ROCCA: That's funny.

SAGAL: Bill, did Mo do well enough to win?

KURTIS: It started out very close - five right, 10 more points just like Alonzo and Paula. But he had one stuffed away. With 13, he won - Mo.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: I would just like to say that, Bill, I have no idea what you just said.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: That was very exciting. All right, though. ** Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.